Growth
26 August 2004 12:50 am
You know you have a good story going when you get visited upon by your characters every waking minute. You think about them before you fall asleep at night, and sometimes you dream about them. When your mind wanders, it is those characters it meets and has conversations with. Then you start thinking about the characters as people; you flesh out their lives with minute details about their past, even if the story you want to tell spans only ten days of their lives. You feel for them. You want to see them happy. You ache for them when you have to write about unhappy events that happen to them.
I write this entry because I finally feel myself growing as a writer. I started out just cultivating the habit of writing every day, with this blog, and for a long time I thought that that was all I was going to be, a diarist, because I wasn't thinking enough about the kind of writing I really want to do, and doing it. I must thank dklwm for giving me that much-needed kick in the ass. If he hadn't encouraged me to send a story to that children's book publisher, I would never have pushed myself to write a finished work of fiction. Although I didn't get the job, the experience got me fired up about writing stories and I surprised myself by editing that 'Friends' story again and again until I came up with a version that I'm satisfied with, even if it's still imperfect. And now I'm starting on a new story, and it's giving me so much joy.
Oh I don't care about whether I'll be published. It's too early to be thinking about that. The point is I started with wanting to write a book and now I'm actually writing it. I try not to get worked up over the quality of my writing. I write as best as I can, as honestly as I can. I know I have a long way to go, and I believe that if a story's worth telling, then you should not rush the telling of it. It must be a labour of love, painstakingly constructed brick by brick.
I've never actually chased my dreams before, to be honest. I've always done the safe thing, like taking up a teaching scholarship (guaranteed employment in Hell for 5 years, yippee). Now I'm doing something just for me, and as slow as my progress has been, I'm getting closer to achieving my dream every day, as long as I keep going.
Thank you, thank you, thank you, God. Without You I am nothing.
Older entries
Ramadan - 08 October 2006
Where I Have Been - 03 October 2006
Baby Talk - 10 August 2006
6 Weeks of Separation - 16 July 2006
Unacceptable Rudeness - 21 June 2006